...The Bacon Explosion

1. I have the distinction of being the best f-ing food ever. Look it up.

5. I am the reason why God invented weaving.

11. My god? I pray to Dr. Atkins.

17. I think that if you're watching your figure, you should stick with the bloomin' onion.

21. I am the favorite food of Dom DeLuise.

25. I could tell you all my secrets, but I'd have to kill you. Just kidding! Anyway you look at it, I will kill you.



Big fat hearts <3,

T.B.E.

...Loki

2. BaconBaconBaconBacon.

5. Mickey starts our walks by yelling "Let's get it on!"

9. CatsCatsCats.

10. I prefer what I wrestle with: the burden of being friggin adorable.

20. SausagesSausagesSausages...Saaaausaaages.

25. Thanks to Evan Rachel Wood, I no longer count myself as the craziest bitch that's been with Mickey.



Ruff! - Loki

...Jessica Simpson

3. There is even more to love now, ya'll!

7. I used to eat Chicken by the Sea tuna…now I prefer seas of chicken.

18. I will rid our country of debt, if you just deep-fat fry it for me.

25. I'm Ashley’s BIG sister. Get it?? “Big” has a double meaning!!



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